There is an affliction quietly and insidiously affecting us that crosses all lines of age, gender and race. It began when we were young and learned that in order to fit in with our families we had to ignore our own needs, stay silent, follow along, and give away our power. As adults this syndrome continues to rob us of our ability to ask directly for what we need and want and drives us to violate ourselves and our own integrity. When we're in its grips, we contort ourselves to fit in, to belong, and to ensure our status as a "good person". In a moment of desperation and powerlessness, we forsake ourselves in order to avoid confrontation and the mere possibility of rejection. This is the dis-ease of trying to be liked, being nice, seeking acceptance, and trying to please others as a strategy - as a way to feel safe in the world and worthy in our own skin. What is even more important to recognize is that seeking the approval of others is a way to avoid how deeply we disapprove of ourselves. The feared rejection of another is actually an outward reflection of how we have already rejected certain aspects of ourselves.
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